Not What I’d Planned
We’re a third of the way through January and I’m still not quite on my game. Truth be told I haven’t written a word in weeks. So much for all the pre-planning I had done with projects, goals, and writing prior to the holidays. I’d normally be the first to say, ‘no excuses’ when it comes to not getting the job done, but this season is different. It’s a new year and a new normal.
Don’t misunderstand, the pages of my calendar would suggest I had things mapped out pretty well, but as life would have it, plans and good intentions get interrupted by reality.
Dealing with Loss
Instead of kicking the year off with a new blog series, planning family get togethers and getting back to a hobby or two, I’m dealing with the loss of my precious mom over the holidays and all the responsibilities that come with losing a parent. My sister and I are navigating these unchartered waters the best we can and working through the emotions of what will, in time, be our new normal.
My sweet mom was 86 so I knew this day would come. But the future has become the present. Selfishly I want her here with me, but I am comforted knowing she is with Jesus and healed. For that I am eternally thankful.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18
Finding a New Normal
So instead of starting off the new year like I’d intended, I’ll be working through some extra baggage; namely the stages of grief. I know it will take time and there’s no calendar to suggest what will be a good day or a not-so-good day. It will be whatever it is. In the meantime, I’ll work on finding a balance between what I want to get done and what I need to get done. Moving forward with the plans and goals I’d written down might take longer or look differently. Either way, my mom would be proud. So much of who I am is because of her. My strength, self-confidence, courage, resilience and love for others are gifts from her. And with God in control I’ll work through my new normal.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
I may be behind the curve a bit as I take on 2019, but there’s a whole lot of year in front of me and I know I must move forward. This wasn’t the fresh start I was planning, but it’s the one I’ve been given and I’m going to be courageous and press on.
Here are suggestions for dealing with a new normal:
- Admit what you’re feeling. Loss is difficult and you must give yourself time to work through the grief. It will be ongoing.
- Remember the good times–memories help you heal.
- Refocus. Take a step back to reorganize your thoughts and what’s ahead of you. Be thoughtful about your next steps but don’t be afraid to forge ahead.
- Claim your new normal. Take joy in the people you’ve loved. Treasure your time together and thank God for the blessings.
What are you dealing with in this new year?