Valentine’s Day is right around the corner and the only reminder we need is to check out the stores decked out in flowers, bags and boxes of chocolate, balloons, stuffed animals, and more.
At my house though, Valentine’s will be just a regular day. Now, before you go feeling sorry for me, let me explain. Somewhere along the way in our 35+ years of marriage, it was decided that we would no longer swap cards, send flowers, eat dinner out, or gift exchange on Valentine’s Day.
Now my sweet man is big on romance, but he says on this particular day flowers and dinner are too expensive (and they are), and that we’re wasting our money on cards, because we just end up throwing them in the trash. His points seem valid.
But the flip side is, I still have every card he’s ever given me and I’ve treasured every box of chocolate, small gift, or bouquet of flowers. And, I’ve never taken any of it for granted.
So when he mentioned again recently that flowers were way too expensive for Valentine’s, I knew he was subtly reminding me of the agreement we made about not buying for the other.
One of the things I appreciate about him is his practicality. I love that our life together is based on the love and friendship we share, and not on gifts or buying power.
I do like to receive a card or a grocery store bouquet occasionally, but we don’t have to shower each other with material things to prove a point or show off.
God wants us to enjoy a life outside of the material world that fixates on stuff. We don’t need the extra baggage to survive, to be happy, or to enjoy one another.
God’s word tells us, “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” 1 Corinthians 13:7 ESV
I believe that’s what my husband wants us to remember and live by. It’s God’s unconditional and everlasting love that allows us to live a life centered on Him. Our commitment to the Lord, to each other, and to our family far outweighs the extraneous stuff that we accumulate. We aren’t perfect and we don’t always agree about everything, but we are committed to eternity and not to the pleasures of this earth.
So instead of focusing on one day and one month to show our love to one another, we make it a part of our everyday life. My sweet man doesn’t require gifts. In fact, he reminds me not to buy him anything.
I’m okay with that because I know the way to his heart–it’s through his stomach. I do my best to see that he has a good meal in the evening, I cook a big breakfast on the weekends because he looks forward to that, and once or twice a month I prepare a favorite dessert. If I’m short on time then I purchase a bag or two of dark chocolate to take the place of the homemade dessert. I’m convinced chocolate is quite possibly the most dependable gift there is.
In turn, he treats me to dinner when he knows my work days have been long, he makes the occasional shopping trip to Wal-Mart so I don’t have to, and he surprises me with a bag of my favorite candy or snack food.
You may think there isn’t a lot of romance in all of this, but I assure you there is. Our philosophy is pretty simple. ‘Life is not made up of stuff. Life is made up of people and the memories we make together.’ It’s about doing for the other because we want to.
Jeremiah 31:3 says, “I have loved you with an everlasting love.”
That’s what I want our marriage to reflect. I want to love my husband with an everlasting love, just like Christ loves me.
Here are 7 ways to show your sweet man that you love and adore him more.
- Hold his hand whenever you have an opportunity.
- Tell him you love him and thank him for what he does.
- Pray for him and with him.
- Send him a text or write a little note with an extra love affirmation.
- Speak words of encouragement to him on a daily basis.
- Plan a date night at home, complete with dinner and a movie.
- Make time for meaningful conversation and really listen to him.
There are so many ways to show your husband how much you love and appreciate him. And while the list above is not exhaustive, it’s a great place to start.
I am blessed by my sweet man. I love his heart for the Lord; I love that he loves me more today than when he married me, and I love that he is a wonderful father and grandfather.
Dear Lord, Thank you so much for your unconditional love. I am so grateful that you brought us together so many years ago, and I’m even more thankful that YOU are the focal point of our marriage. You cover us in love, grace, and mercy and You make the impossible, possible. May we continue to grow in your ways and spread love everywhere we go. In your Precious Name~Amen.
Blessings & Hugs!
Amy Elaine says
Love LOVE Love that pic of you two! Our anniversary is so close to the 14th that we don’t really do Valentine’s Day either. I love your advice to hold hands whenever you can- that’s sweet and something I try to do! Thanks for the reminders of how easy it is to show our love through action and not our pocketbook! Great stuff girl! <3
The pics you have posted to commemorate your anniversary are such sweet memories. I think the older we get or the longer we are married helps us to see that what we do together far outweighs the material stuff. Thank you sweet friend. Happy Anniversary one more time.❤
I love this Mitzi! I’m more like your hubby….very practical! I tell my hubby to pick me some flowers and handwrite me a note. That means just as much and it’s a lot cheaper! I love that y’all know how to love and appreciate each other.
Amen to that sweet friend! That’s really us too–it’s the little things that matter the most.
Carolina Cisneros says
This is so true. Love this beautiful post. God bless y’all and have a beautiful stuff-less Valentines. The best kind. <3 Commenting and Tweeting you out from His Girls Gather. <3
Thank you so much Carolina! Love your heart for Jesus–so thankful for the little things. Blessings to you.
Kathryn Shirey says
Great ideas! and great reminder to focus on relationship and not let the busy of life get in the way.